No ‘poo!

No, I am not constipated. I ate way too much chia pudding this week to be constipated… T.M.I. sorry. Also, I may be an asshole, no actually, I AM an asshole, but thankfully this post is not about them. Also, this post is not about Kanye West, because then it would, in fact, be about assholes. And, Imma let you read this, but let me first say that I am a much better reader than you… I digress.

No poo (aka no shampoo) is a regime I got started on about a year and a half ago. This broad I work with who looks like Carly Rea Jepsen spent the night at my house, and in the morning her hair looked absolutely perfect. I was jealous because that morning my hair looked ratchet as hell… so I asked the broad I work with who looks like Carly Rea Jepsen what her secret was. And she said, no poo! To which I probably replied, “are you still drunk from last night?” That’s when the broad I work with who looks like Carly Rea Jepsen told me that “no poo” means you essentially (try to) forgo all commercial hair products in favor of “shampoo” made of a mixture of baking soda and water, and “conditioner” of watered down apple cider vinegar. My first thought was that my hair was going to reek like vinegar all day and people would stare at me in public. Turns out that is not the case, I have no idea why but once you rinse the vinegar out of your hair you cannot smell it at all. Anyway, my current routine is to wash my hair about 3 times a week, and/or every time after I work out. (I don’t feel like I’m working out unless I’m sweating and feel like I am going to pass out afterwards…)

In my shower, I keep a plastic water bottle, for my “shampoo,” and a solo cup for my “conditioner.” As a recently former college student, there is an abundance of solo cups in my household. So, I usually put about 2 or 3 tablespoons of baking soda in my water bottle before I get in the shower, and maybe 1/8 cup of apple cider vinegar in my solo cup. Then, I fill both of them about half way with water. My “shampoo” water bottle lasts me 2 washes. The “conditioner” cup usually lasts me a week or two. It doesn’t really run out since I just dip my hair in it, but I change it out so it doesn’t get grody.

When washing my hair, I try to concentrate the baking soda mixture on my roots and massage it into my scalp, like you would with any other shampoo. After I rinse that out of my hair, I dip my hair into the “conditioner.” I try to let that sit for a minute or so before I rinse that out. That’s it! I almost always blow dry my hair after I wash it, and sometimes straighten it. I’ve found that now my hair holds style much better than when I used typical shampoo and conditioner.

On a side note, I will also add that I have relatively fine hair, and in the past my hair typically got greasy very quickly. I do have moderately oily skin so, it wasn’t an enormous surprise to me that my scalp was oily too. I would wash my hair every single day and sometime not condition it, and it would still look flat and oily before the day was over. I’ve learned now that my hair got oily so quickly because it was over producing natural oils in order to make up for the oils I kept stripping out of my hair. As a result of switching to “no poo” my hair has gotten significantly less oily. Like night and day of a  difference. Previously, I wouldn’t even imagine of going 3 days without washing my hair, and now that’s no big deal.

I won’t say that I have 100% omitted commercial hair products from my life either. I still use hair spray once in a while. I also sometime use just a tiny bit of coconut oil to tame any fly-aways I have after straightening my hair. Which I know is terrible for my hair… but I’ve made somewhat of an effort here, okay?! In case you want more reasons to try “no poo,” see below!

Why in the hell would forgo washing your hair?

  1. For starters, commercial shampoo pretty much strips your hair of all it’s natural oils, then conditioner just replaces it with synthetic chemicals. There are obvious health concerns with any chemicals that you put in or on your body. All you have to do it take a look at your shampoo label to realize how many crazy chemicals you are lathering up just centimeters from your precious brain. For real though, I’m not a crazy hippy or anything but once I started to become a habitual label reader, I am much more cognizant of what products I use.
  2. Not only are these chemicals bad for your body, they are presumably bad for the environment too, but what do I know. It’s like  I ride my bicycle to work. So yeah, I don’t even pretend like I am tree hugger, but I really wish I was a better proponent of the environment. Maybe that will be my New Years resolution… next year…
  3. Bragg's Organic Raw Unfiltered Apple Cider Vinegar

    Bragg’s Organic Raw Unfiltered Apple Cider Vinegar

    Salon hair products are pricey as hell! I’ve gotten 13.5 lbs. of baking soda at Sam’s Club for about $7… which lasted me literally a year. I was using it for a slew of different things in addition to my “shampoo” mixture. Apple cider vinegar is less reasonably priced, I prefer raw organic unfiltered apple cider vinegar. That’s a mouthful, right? I buy the brand featured in the image, for no other reason than that they carry it at my local grocery store.

So, for the TL;DR version: I don’t use commercial hair products, and instead use baking soda and water as “shampoo” and apple cider vinegar and water as “conditioner.”

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